S. Guraziu – Ars Poetica, May 2026 – Space Tourists (Alpha Centaurians) and Turkish Ancestors
(Spoken greetings in 55 ancient and modern languages)
When NASA launched the Voyager 1 and 2 spacecraft in 1977, they equipped them with the famous Golden Record – a cosmic mixtape designed to introduce humanity to extraterrestrial civilizations. The record features greetings in 55 different languages, meant to project a message of universal peace to the stars.
It was recorded also a kinda official “general greeting from earthlings”, in the name of humanity Secretary-General of the UN, Kurt Waldheim, was quite humble “…We step out of our solar system into the universe, seeking only peace and friendship, to teach, if we are called upon, to be taught, if we are fortunate… and it is with humility and hope that we take this step…”.
All other greetings in 55 languages, most of them played it safe. The French track casually says, “Hello everybody.” The English track offers a broad, “Greetings.” The Amoy Chinese dialect practically invites them over for dinner, asking, “Have you eaten yet?”
The Chinese (Mandarin) even asked them, if they’re not busy, if enough free time, to come visit us, cause we earthlings wish very much too meet extraterrestrials, “How’s everyone? We all very much wish to meet you, if you’re free please come and visit”.
Etc., all of languages did it well, but if you look closely at the Turkish track, human logic takes a hilarious, highly exclusive detour into a cosmic paradox. Recorded by an American archaeology professor named Peter Ian Kuniholm, the exact Turkish greeting translates to: “Dear Turkish-speaking friends, may the honors of the morning be upon your heads.” (Sayın Türkçe bilen arkadaşlarımız, sabah şerifleriniz hayrolsun)
Think about that from a strict, logical perspective. By explicitly addressing “Turkish-speaking friends,” it seems NASA did not send a message just to “some unspecified” aliens. They sent a highly specific invitation to a very select group of extraterrestrials.
This leaves us with some logical, hilarious scenarios for how deep-space history actually went down. The first one might be the “Cosmic Bazaar Tourists” theory. Millions of years ago, advanced alien life forms didn’t just observe Earth from afar. They flew down, took a summer vacation in ancient Turkey, visited the Grand Bazaar, drank some Turkish coffee, and picked up the local language before flying back to the Andromeda galaxy.
The second theory would be real “Turkish extraterrestrials”. Imagine a hyper-advanced alien species intercepting Voyager in five million years. They meticulously build a record player, decode the audio tracks, and hear the universal greetings. But when the Turkish track plays, the alien translator panics: “Wait, stop the tape! This message is strictly restricted to Alpha Centaurians who speak fluent Turkish, cause they are Turkish. We only speak binary. We aren’t authorized to listen to this part!”
That also leaves the possibilty for other speculations as well. One could argue that “Turkish” ancestors could have been Alpha Centaurians. They came here on Earth and stayed forever, establishing thus the… well the Turkish we know today.
The question arises, how did this beautiful mistake make it onto a multi-million-dollar space probe overseen by the legendary Carl Sagan? Honestly, it doesn’t matter that much how, the fact alone that it did happen, for us is enough to smile. As it turns out, the summer of 1977 was a frantic, last-minute rush at Cornell University. Sagan’s committee was running out of time to gather the 55 languages. To get it done, Sagan’s wife literally walked around the university campus, grabbing foreign students, professors, and scholars, shoving them into a recording room with zero instructions other than: “Say a brief greeting to space”.
Given absolute freedom and a microphone, Professor Kuniholm decided to use a poetic, formal Ottoman-style morning greeting. Addressing the aliens as “friends who know Turkish” was his witty, personal way of handling a bizarre request.
Carl Sagan famously noted that the Golden Record was like a bottle thrown into the cosmic ocean. Yes, a bootle into cosmic ocean, very true, but thanks to a sharp eye for linguistic irony, we now know that inside that bottle is the ultimate interstellar easter egg. So, as Voyager 1 drifts deeper into the interstellar void, we can all smile knowing that humanity’s grandest scientific achievement is currently searching the galaxy for aliens who can say “merhaba”, or who can successfully order a kebab.
Read all the “cosmic greetings”, in 55 languages of Earth: [ w ]
(for the first time I mentioned this in an article, 2021 – “Disku i Artë” për alienët e Universit)
Përshëndetja e inçizuar në Turqisht, sipas meje na del mjaft “alogjike”. Meqë i bie sikur atëbotë NASA pandehte se kozmosi patjetër do ketë alienë që dinë turqisht. Ec e mos buzëqesh me largpamësinë e NASA : )
[ https://letrat.eu/?p=7249 ]